A Season to Follow

As much as I knew that the season after graduating from college was going to be one of uncertainty, I also knew that it would be one about pursuing God. I felt this from the beginning. Back in February God calmed my restless heart when I asked about the future. And he told me, "I want you here, not going anywhere, because I have something to teach you before we can move on." And so I accepted it. I dreamed of it, of the days and weeks and months of pursuing God like I once used to- where I was looking for Him faithfully every day, not just when I happened to turn a worship song on in the car.

But then life happened. Summer began and it turned into chaos, then heartbreak, then laziness. So I told myself I was waiting for fall, as if new days on the calendar and crisper weather would suddenly change everything. To be completely, embarrassingly honest with you: I have been so bad at discipline lately, and it's leaking out into every area of my life. I know that's not cute or fancy to hear, and it's even dangerous to admit on the internet. But it's the truth, and I have to say it.

Yet God is so gracious. He has been telling me several times this summer that the season he has prepared for me is going to be wonderful and amazing, and all about him showing me how much he loves me. I've longed for that for so long, and yet I still feel stuck sometimes. But God keeps whispering faithfully, never growing weary of my restless, undisciplined heart. It's as if he's built this amazing mansion- this palace- that he so desperately wants to show me, but I keep pacing back and forth in front of the door, peeking in every now and then but changing my mind just as I'm about to step inside.

I wish I could say that this is the turning point. That starting tomorrow, everything will change. But I'm not a fan of empty promises, and I'd rather not make commitments I'm likely to break. So this is a hopeful post instead. An honest story about where I am right now, and where I want to be. Because I know God is waiting (so patiently, as He does) on the other side, arms open, ready to show me what He's got. And it's going to be amazing.

Whatever your season of life right now, whatever chaos and craziness is going on around you- there is something God has been waiting to show you. There is something he has prepared for your heart. It may be healing or a revelation about his love, or a truth about yourself you've forgotten. But whatever it is, it will change everything. His words always do.

“Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the wilderness and speak tenderly to her. There I will give her back her vineyards, and will make the Valley of Achor a door of hope. There she will respond as in the days of her youth." (Hosea 2:14-15)

#christian #2015