No One Really Has it All Together
- priscillawrites
- Oct 7, 2015
- 3 min read
Every now and then you come across a realization- an epiphany even- that has the potential to set you free. In the midst of all my recent anxiety and restlessness, this is the realization that has done that for me:
No one really has it all together.
The media and society in general have painted us this picture of what it means to be a put-together adult. It means having a stable 9-5 job, being engaged or married, having a car and a house and a retirement plan. It means having a gym membership (and using it) and dressing well (business casual is preferred), and of course, eating a well balanced diet from Whole Foods. And somehow all these things put together will create the perfect emotional, physical, and spiritual being. I mean, how could they not?
But to be honest with you, I've never really met someone who had it all together. I've met people with great jobs, sure, and a comfortable amount of money. Many whom are in great physical shape and are on their way to following their wildest dreams. But even those people- even the people who we love to envy on our social media feeds- even they do not "have it all." Everyone faces a place of lack whether they want to admit it or not. The workaholic making hundreds of thousands of dollars may be facing a weak social life because she lacks the time. The nomad adventurer may secretly long for stability and a family when he goes to bed at night. Life is ultimately a series of trade-offs and we cannot, no matter how much marketing and social media try to convince us- have a perfect handle on everything. We are limited beings in a limited world.
So why don't we break the illusion once and for all? Why don't we stop pursuing perfection and idealism and learn to be okay with a little bit of imbalance because our world is inherently imperfect? To be completely honest, I've been facing a lot of anxiety since school started back up for so many people around me, and I know much of it has come from this pressure that society- and our own minds- put on us to have it all together.
But I am tired of pretending, and I am done striving for something so impossible. I am a human, so I am imperfect and to some extent I always will be until Jesus comes back. That doesn't mean I'm not striving for growth because of course that should be our priority, but it does mean that I'm not going to beat myself up over my imperfections.
The truth is that even though I'm proud of myself for rejecting the traditional college-to-full-time-job-route, I'm also scared of being unconventional. I'm anxious much more than I should be, and it's not always because I've had excessive amounts of caffeine. I'm not very good at building community around me, and I'm definitely not good at being vulnerable with others. I'm still learning how to be disciplined and how to stick to the deadlines I set for myself. I need to work out more, and eat healthier and save more money than I spend.
I am an imperfect work in progress.
But guess what? There is freedom for that. There is grace for that. Our hearts will always long for perfection and acceptance because we were created for that before sin came into the world. But that's where God comes in. That's where grace comes in. Because while we may not be able to have it all together, we can always have joy and peace and rest. We may not ever reach the ideal image of a perfect adult that society wants us to be, but we can reach true purpose and fulfillment by knowing God.
And that is the biggest relief of all.
p.s. These resources below have added so much to my life lately, and are part of the reason I've been letting these truths sink in: