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The Playlist of My Life (So far)

I recently just wrapped up one of those monthly music challenges for Instagram. You know, the one where you post a different song each day to your story based on the category of a template, even though you know no one is really paying attention besides you, but what else is there to do in quarantine?


It's a nice little waste of time. But kidding aside, I actually really enjoyed it. It made me reflect on some of the songs I love, and the ones that mean different things to me. Honestly, for many years I've been the kind of person that just listens to the same songs over and over again because that's how much I love them. But over the past year or so, my music taste has grown a bit. I've found new songs that I love, almost as much as the same ones by The Fray (my all time favorite band) that I always listen to.


So, since there is still so much time to kill, I decided to make a blog post in honor of that kind of music. Teen Vogue does this really neat thing with celebrities where they'll have them share songs that would make up the "Playlist of Their Life." They're basically songs that have special meaning to them, or that describe seasons of their lives somehow. They haven't contacted me for an interview yet, so in the meantime I thought I'd share my list here.


Lonely Weekend by Kacey Musgraves


Golden Hour is one of those albums that I fell in love with the moment I listened to it (which was quite awhile after it was released, but better late than never right?). It has such a peaceful, bittersweet vibe, and this song in particular is one I relate to so well. It's sort of an introvert anthem, capturing both the feeling of peace when you're alone and the melancholy of missing someone at the same time.


Favorite Lyrics:

Even if you got somebody on your mind

It's alright to be alone sometimes.


Butterfly by Josh Garrels


I love the melody of this song and the way it builds to the chorus, but also the metaphor in the lyrics. It’s so poetic and beautiful. It's also a worship song, but in its own unique and subtle way. I just love how it speaks about redemption, alluding to both Jesus' resurrection, but also how we become new creations in Him.


Favorite lyrics:

Oh oh oh oh, Butterfly

Unfold the mystery

To rise up from the earth into the sky

On resurrected wings


Nolita Fairytale by Vanessa Carlton


Part of the reason this song is on this list is because it's nostalgic for me. I used to love it back in junior high. But it's also one I relate to in that it captures that quietly rebellious spirit of wanting to live your life your own way, and decide on your own definition of success. It's about finding yourself in a new place that feels like home, and letting go of the things you realize didn't matter as much as you thought they did.


Favorite Lyrics:

Now take the glitz back, I want the soul instead

'Cause I found some kind of fairytale


Muse by Jenny & Tyler

To me, this song perfectly captures what it feels like to be a writer, or really an artist of any kind. That strong desire you have to express yourself with your art, but feeling like the words are stuck in your throat and you're not quite sure how to get them out. It plays with the idea of the artistic muse and the way we long for inspiration.

Favorite lyrics:

O come to me my muse and set me free

Break the chains that bind the words my soul longs to speak

Coastline by Hollow Coves


This song is about running away to a peaceful place where you can be alone with someone and just forget about everything else. It feels kind of like a daydream in the form of a song. I've always had this fantasy where I pack up and move to a completely different city, or country even, and make a peaceful home for myself there. Obviously it's not the most realistic daydream, and no place on earth is really going to be perfect. But I think this song does a great job of capturing that innate desire in us for a place that's so perfect that it helps us become who we were always meant to be.


And there's a place that I've dreamed of

Where I can free my mind

I hear the sounds of the season

And lose all sense of time


Absolute by The Fray

I couldn't not include a song by The Fray. One of the things I most love about their songs is how often the lyrics are so poetic that they're open to interpretation. This song has always made me reflect on how we can sometimes feel so far away from resolution in relationships. How hard it can seem to cross that bridge to another person because of a misunderstanding, or our wrong assumptions. I love the soft line quiet, but I'm sure there is something here, because it makes me think of that patience we often need when we get to know someone, as it takes awhile for each person to open up to the other.


Favorite line:

Quiet, but I'm sure there is something here

Tell me everything 'cause I want to hear

Restless Ones by LaPeer


This is another song that feels very much like it was meant for introverts, or maybe more accurately, the dreamers of the world. People who may feel too sensitive at first. But once they learn to tap into their empathy, they use their voice for something meaningful. I think of it as sort of an anthem for misfits discovering they never needed to fit in at all.


Favorite Lyrics:

We are the quiet ones

Broken with sticks and stones

But when you make your choice

Go out and find your voice

We'll see this world ignite


100 Years by Five for Fighting


This is another nostalgic song that I've loved for years. It's a full life described in a song, basically, casting a glance at how our priorities change throughout our different ages. It's a wistful song and makes me think of the value of each stage of our lives, and just reminds me of how meaningful and rich everyone's life story is, even if at face value it seems ordinary to us.


Favorite Lyrics:

I'm ninety nine for a moment

Dying for just another moment

And I'm just dreaming

Counting the ways to where you are

Awaken by Dario Marianelli


Yes this is classical, but I had to include it because the last minute and a half of this song is some of the most beautiful music I've ever heard. This was composed for the 2011 version of Jane Eyre, which is my favorite novel, and one of the books that has had the greatest impact in my life. It also features a violin in the last part of the song, the first instrument I learned to play. I see the music as building up to that feeling you get when you finally get to live out the dream you have for your life, when you don't have to hold back from what you've longed for because you were concerned about what others might think. If you listen to any song on this list, just listen to the last two minutes of this. It's incredible.


Green by Ben Rector


This song is quite similar to Coastline by Hollow Coves, but I had to include it anyway because it's also so beautiful. The way that the beauty and nature of a place can capture the way you feel in a certain season of your life is what most speaks to me about this song.


Favorite Lyrics:

I've never seen a greener green than that

The sea salt air I'm breathin' brings life back



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